Have trouble letting something go? Do you have a hard time looking someone in the eyes? Are you holding a grudge?
If you get anything right in ministry or life for that matter, get this… reconciliation is THE priority. If you don’t practice this on a regular basis then you are not demonstrating what God has done for you. Unfortunately, the enemy has you right where he wants you too.
Jesus gives us grace. Just as we are, he accepts us in our mess. So, if we are to imitate Christ in our life, why do we sulk and drag our feet when it comes to making amends after someone wrongs us or we know we have wronged someone else. Jesus himself when being crucified said, “Father forgive them, they know not what they do.” Luke 23:24
In ministry you can choose to emphasize or run away from reconciliation. Often you will find those you lead in these situations. After some pretty brutal storms of my own, I now look at these hard times as an opportunity to display what Christ has displayed for us and lead others through it.
Having been wronged or wronging others, my experience has been deep and wide. I’ve had reconciling moments with my wife, senior pastors, direct supervisors, my peers, and even those I lead.
It’s the access to a beautiful gospel that allows this reconciliation.
I love how the Message puts it: “Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.” Colossians 3:13
I have never been shot down in an attempt of reconciliation when wearing my all-purpose garment. People can smell love a mile away. Likewise, they can smell a forced apology.
- Keep short, quick accounts.
- Be genuine.
- Listen to the other party without interrupting.
- Follow up with an email, phone call, or text thanking them for hearing you out.