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Putting out fires and starting new ones.

March 9, 2015 by Chris Parker Leave a Comment

APTOPIX Western Wildfires Yosemite

Recently I watched a documentary on forest fires within Yellowstone, reminding me what I had seen first hand last summer. The charred and barren spots within the park remind us that fires can be damaging or beneficial, sometimes both. This all depends on where the fire begins, the duration of the fire, and the one fighting the fire.

Ministry can often feel like you are playing the role of a fire fighter, and many times it can feel lonely. [Read more…]

Filed Under: Leadership, Student Ministry Tagged With: armor, church, division, firefighter, leadership, stumin, unity, volunteer, wildfires, Youth Ministry, youth pastor

Church & School – Build the Bridge! (DIY9.10)

May 15, 2013 by Chris Parker 1 Comment

blueschool-hallwayThis is in response to a former article I wrote on DIY Student Ministry. This is the ninth of ten areas that I’m covering in this series.

Nothing says, “I want to be in your world” more than a visit to the student’s school. Whether it be for lunch in the cafeteria or sitting in the student section at a football game – when you approach the school you approach where they do most of their life. Now before I get into this, we must make an observation…some schools are open and some are closed, meaning some schools will let you and your volunteers into the building for lunch with your students while others will not. There are some loopholes. Some campuses would like to make you think they are closed…start asking questions of where they need help or how you can meet with an individual student. The administration may start by asking you to fill out a volunteer application or have a written letter on file from the parent of the student you are meeting with.

When you get into a student’s world at school, you will better understand the crowd you are trying to reach on a weekly basis. If you lose touch of this, you diminish your effectiveness as a student pastor. You might as well be teaching an empty hallway.

When I was in Chicago the campuses were closed but I was able to apply for a mentor program that allowed me to get on campus and meet with students that needed help thinking through the process of going to college. This allowed me to see some of my students but also meet students I didn’t already know.

Here in Austin it’s a little bit of both, it’s actually not even consistent within each school district. I had a regular habit of visiting the closest school this semester until things got ridiculously busy. One thing I quickly discovered was that my HS group of 60 students represented 16 different high schools in the Austin area. Knowing that I barely had the time to visit one school, I knew that do-it-yourself student ministry would not have the impact that these students and schools needed from the church. I currently have one HS volunteer visiting (going through the application process) the school I was visiting and one MS volunteer visiting a MS just down the road. Slowly but surely I hope to get more of my leaders and volunteers to help build the bridge between the church and school.

Here are some ways to get started:

  • Do a prayer walk. Pick a Saturday morning, invite your volunteers and walk the campus asking God to open doors (literally) for you and your team.
  • Just do it! Try to meet with one of your students with lunch. Make sure to check-in with the office.
  • Schedule a meeting with the principal, let him/her know that you and your volunteers are available for anything that they may need help with.
  • Go to the games. Students love to be supported, make a sign, paint your face, make it memorable!
  • Send a gift basket their way with a card in it on teacher appreciation day.
  • Offer to plant flowers or do landscaping to make the campus a more enjoyable place, see if the garden center in your town would donate flowers and plants to this.
  • Recruit specific volunteers to be the liaison for a specific campuses. Get this team together in the late summer to strategize and set goals for the school year. Talk about what success looks like.

How have you made a presence on your school campus? What is your success story of partnering with a local school?

This is in response to a former article I wrote on DIY Student Ministry. This is the ninth of ten areas that I’m covering in this series.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: austin, bridge, chicago, church, DIY, games, hallway, high school, leader, middle school, prayer walk, principal, school, student ministry, student pastor, stumin, turf, volunteer, youth pastor

Supply Run! (DIY8.10)

May 8, 2013 by Chris Parker 2 Comments

shopping-cartThis is in response to a former article I wrote on DIY Student Ministry. This is the eighth of ten areas that I’m covering in this series.

I’ll make this one short and sweet. You don’t need to do all of the shopping for your ministry. There are plenty of leaders and parents out there that are willing to swing by the store for you, just ask. Get away from do-it-yourself student ministry by delegating to others, allowing them to be a piece in the process of pulling your program or event together. Bringing others into your supply run outings can bring great benefits.

ALWAYS

  • Ask another leader or parent to do your supply run.
  • Encourage leaders to take students with them, it’s a great time to build community.
  • Have a supply list prepared, more time is wasted in the store if you don’t have a list.
  • Understand your method of payment and how reimbursements work at your church, be up front with your leaders/parents and make sure they get their reimbursement.

IDEAS

  • Amazon Prime – Free two day shipping on most items, delivered right to the church. Eliminates the time and money spent on an outing to the store.
  • The dollar store…hidden treasures await you and your students.
  • Old stuff in your youth storage space, you haven’t used this stuff in a year. Get creative with supplies you already have or bring back an old game.

Subscribe to lifeofayouthpastor in the top right corner of this page, pass the homelink on to friends that might benefit from these postings. Thanks for reading!

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: DIY, leader, list, parent, shop, shopping, student ministry, student pastor, stumin, supply run, volunteer, Youth Ministry, youth pastor

My Youth Year Resolution: 2013

December 31, 2012 by Chris Parker Leave a Comment

New Year 2013Wishing I could have a friendship with each and every student in my ministry is not realistic. Youth pastors are sometimes accused of having a few favorites, taking a special interest in a handful of students and hanging out with them all the time. And while that may be true, the greater truth is that when it comes to 100+ students, you can hardly remember all the names and say “Hi” to each of them on a Sunday morning. Students need more than just a “Hi” each week. Students need someone that is intentionally and consistently investing in their life, taking special interest in their spiritual development as they explore God and mature in their faith journey. I suppose someone needs to play favorites after all, it shouldn’t be solely the role of the youth pastor.

Programs are great teaching moments and momentum boosters, but authentic relationships is the glue of ministry – it keeps people together.

What’s my youth year resolution? In 2013 I plan to launch a small group movement for both middle school and high school students at my church. Connecting a student to an adult that is demonstrating an authentic relationship with God will benefit a student’s growth far more than any program. Life on life discipleship is not a new invention nor will it expire, this is what Jesus displayed for us. He did life with 12 men. He traveled with them, stayed up late with them, explored cities with them, went on camping trips with them, went hiking with them, went sailing with them…talked life with them, spoke truth to them, asked them the hard questions. There is no doubt according to scripture that these were monumental moments for the 12, that’s why we have them in writing.

Your leaders/volunteers may not be Jesus, but they do have the time to spend with students. How will they spend this time? How will they lead their group? What kind of adventures will they go on? Imagine how much impact a Christ following adult could have on 12 teenage lives.

Though I aspire to launch a small group movement for students, it begins with my leaders. Offer a small group or multiple small groups for your leaders – period. This not only helps in laying a foundation for students, but you can better grasp understanding of where they are at in their relationship with God and others. Seeing your leadership in a small group setting on a regular basis will hopefully be reflected in the way that they lead their small group.

Equipping them is key, find multiple ways to make this happen:

  • Get personal. Spend time with each leader, cast vision for them, help them set goals.
  • Develop a small group survival kit for them. More on this later.
  • Take them to a conference or on a retreat. We are going to Orange in January.
  • Show up at small group, let them know in advance. Give them feedback, applause and constructive criticism.

A few books to consider when initiating or developing a small group movement:

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: adult leader, church, Church Planting, leadership, Orange, small group, small groups, student ministry, volunteer, Youth Ministry, youth pastor

Pushing Pancakes!

August 20, 2012 by Chris Parker 5 Comments

Now your speaking my language…hot pancakes. I’m not really a sucker for pancakes, but free hot food? Heck ya! Yesterday the student ministry at Gateway went through dozens of pancakes, probably a few hundred. Why? A touchdown had literally just been handed to us and I wanted to go for 2 rather than settle for a field goal. Let me explain. Gateway has done a phenomenal job of making me and my wife feel welcome to the church. This weekend we were introduced to 300+ volunteers and leaders at a conference and then again in all Sunday morning services yesterday, TOUCHDOWN! While we could have simply just expressed our gratitude we took this opportunity to welcome others!

“Come and eat pancakes with us after the service!”

We invited parents to meet us after service while also putting the ask out to anyone who may have the interest in serving students. What did we get in return? We have 22 brand new contacts that have expressed interest in serving students!

What did it take to make this happen?

  • Approval from my supervisor and church leadership – don’t burn bridges, or pancakes for that matter!!!
  • Prayer. I have been praying about this eagerly and with anticipation since it was a reality.
  • Leaders/Volunteers giving some extra time, committing to more than one service – helping flip pancakes and talk with potential volunteers.
  • 10 boxes of pancake mix ($1.34 a box), 3 bottles of syrup ($1.84 a bottle), a tub of butter (my buddy Jon found it in the fridge), two electric griddles from Wal-Mart (purchased them for our mission trip, they make a mean grilled cheese!)
  • A clear invite – Are you a parent? Do you have an interest in serving in student ministry? Come have pancakes with us, we would love to meet you! Keep it simple.
  • A contact sheet – collect contact information. Just because they grab a volunteer application doesn’t ensure they will be back.
  • Volunteer/Leader Application.

The BIG idea: Do something out of the ordinary that involves free food and an opportunity to show others how they can get involved in your ministry!

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: 22, application, austin, Gateway, gateway church austin, introduce, leaders, pancakes, push, student minsitry, touchdown, volunteer, youth pastor

The tough conversation…

June 28, 2012 by Chris Parker Leave a Comment

We have all been there – knowing we need to have that tough conversation with a friend, relative or peer. The conversation is not being looked forward to because you know there will be confrontation in your conversation. As much as you would like to think that this person will eventually ‘get it’ most of the time they won’t unless you talk it out.

There have been many times in my life I have been the one confronted…and if done right, I am forever grateful! There have also been times that I have been on the other side, trying to confront someone about something…perhaps it’s an attitude, a cycle of sin, or even just feedback on how someone is leading. I think we all have been on either side of the equation and I’d like to take a moment to unfold some things to keep in mind that will help you the next time you are approached by someone with a confrontation or perhaps you need to have the tough conversation with someone else.

1. Show some humility. We are all sinners here, remember you have had your moments too! Any situation can be a learning moment, do not put yourself above the person that is calling you out – hear them out. When you sit down to have a conversation with a student, leader, or peer and want to confront them – think about where you have struggled in life, perhaps in the same areas.

2. Be quick to speak…scripture tells us not to let the sun go down if we are angry with our brother or sister in Christ. We need to talk things out –  NOT in the heat of the moment, take a breath, take a walk, talk with God first. We need to make sure we are speaking in love, not out of our sin nature in anger or hate. Have open ears to listen to the other person, but we cannot let important feedback linger. If we confront someone about a situation that took place 6 months ago, this could blur the lines of caring, urgency, and priority. If it was that important, why are you waiting until now to bring it up? Avoiding the conversation will only make things worse and furthermore show that this confrontation is not important.

3. Be honest. I know that when I’m honest with a student or leader, there might be some questions, dislike, hurt feelings, perhaps even disagreement but in the end they usually thank me for being honest. The worst thing that could happen is being honest with others about how you feel toward a particular person without being honest directly with that specific person, this is called GOSSIP! Honesty can and will complicate conversations, but it does bring us closer to the realities we are discussing and the feelings we are feeling.

4. Follow Up. I had a really tough conversation with a student a few weeks ago – it was honest, we both showed humility, and both of us saw it as a learning experience. We perceived certain things about each other that seemed to drive a wedge between us…we both perceived wrongly. It was so good to clear the air and have the tough conversation. Through tears, prayer and hug I still felt a little bit uneasy where things were left UNTIL the follow up. We briefly talked exactly a week later and I feel much better as where things stand. Tough conversations can be really hard for both the listener and the one who feels compelled to say something…let it settle in for a while. Evaluate the conversation as you have it, will this need to be re-visited? Do I need to bring in a parent or church staff member into this conversation? What would be the best way to follow up? Make it a point to tell your listener…”I’d like to follow up next week.” And do it! This shows that your truly care about them. Ask them how they are doing, ask them if they have had any thoughts on the conversation you had. If you are the listener and you think it may be needed, make sure you ask for a follow up conversation. Some things might be revealed to you that you should not respond to in the heat of the moment, let it settle…pray over the things said, do a self evaluation and perhaps seek wise counsel from someone you respect.

Though there are many things to consider, but these few things kept in mind when having a tough conversation can be extremely helpful. I know they have helped me!

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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: care, Childrens Ministry, church, confrontation, conversation, follow up, honesty, humility, leadership, ministry, pastor, tough conversation, volunteer, Youth Ministry, youth pastor

Hey there, my name is Chris. I wake up every morning thinking youth ministry. If you are in the same boat, then I know you will identify with me, because you also live the life of a youth pastor .

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