Life of a youth pastor .

Got Curriculum?

by Leave a Comment

This past year the youth ministry staff at Wheaton Bible Church did a trial run of the LIVE curriculum put out by Simply Youth Ministry.  It somewhat became my baby from the beginning, I was intrigued by the internet platform…getting everyone signed up for it, helping design particular curriculum paths 7th-12th grade and ensuring that my leaders knew how to use LIVE. Needless to say, THIS STUFF IS AWESOME! I know each youth pastor and small group leader will have their own preferences for curriculum, and that’s the beauty of LIVE…it is totally customizable from top to bottom. You can edit each lesson to be your own, choose topics each grade will study throughout a school year AND it provides an online platform for your leaders to prepare for their group! Over the next few posts I would like to dive into deeper detail on why LIVE was a WIN for us this past year and how LIVE could be a WIN for your youth ministry this coming Fall.

Get new postings fed directly to your mailbox by subscribing via Email in the top right corner!

Celestial City Lights…

by Leave a Comment

These are the city lights of Chicago…you can see a sprawling metropolis that goes on for miles. As my plane was doing a loop waiting for landing space at O’hare I was able to take in the city, pick out the skyline, particular buildings that were familiar to me and even cars on Lakeshore Dr.  This plane ride was very different than many before. I have made this flight at least 20 times since going to school at Moody Bible Institute and then living in Wheaton, IL. This flight was different knowing that it would be one of my last times for a while flying into Chicago, Austin will be our new place of residency. My stomach was in knots knowing that I am leaving a youth ministry I love, people I have relationships with over 6 years now, and just the thought of boxing up our life and moving south some 1,000 miles was becoming more and more of a reality. Though I am incredibly excited about this transition and the team I will be doing life with in Texas, it’s still something hard to swallow. As I sat in my seat gazing out the window over Chicago city lights, I simply prayed, “God, give me peace…reveal yourself to me.” I’m not exaggerating when I say, not even a second later I followed out a well lit highway to see this sitting right below me….

I know it’s hard to make out but this is Wheaton Bible Church….just below the really bright light (that’s a new ballpark the city just put in). Out of all the lights that make up Chicago, God allowed my eyes to see this tiny spec on the map. Though a tiny spec on the map, Wheaton Bible Church along with Gateway Church in Austin are only two of thousands upon millions of shimmering lights that make up the celestial lights in the city of God! God brought abundant peace to my soul and amazing understanding to see how He works through his church body among the nations to build up His eternal kingdom. I cannot wait to get the bird’s eye view from heaven one day to see how the global church of history past has partnered together in building up the kingdom of God…one light at a time.

Paul’s words come to mind when he is encouraging the church at Philippi …

Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the Word of life—in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing.

It has become more apparent to me than ever before due to my time of transition, we all have our separate church buildings, neighborhoods, and communities that we would consider our “church” home, but let us not forget the kingdom that we all share in building together. We are all batting for the same team. Hopefully one day you can share in the bird’s eye view, today you can only live intentionally in light of that day.

The tough conversation…

by Leave a Comment

We have all been there – knowing we need to have that tough conversation with a friend, relative or peer. The conversation is not being looked forward to because you know there will be confrontation in your conversation. As much as you would like to think that this person will eventually ‘get it’ most of the time they won’t unless you talk it out.

There have been many times in my life I have been the one confronted…and if done right, I am forever grateful! There have also been times that I have been on the other side, trying to confront someone about something…perhaps it’s an attitude, a cycle of sin, or even just feedback on how someone is leading. I think we all have been on either side of the equation and I’d like to take a moment to unfold some things to keep in mind that will help you the next time you are approached by someone with a confrontation or perhaps you need to have the tough conversation with someone else.

1. Show some humility. We are all sinners here, remember you have had your moments too! Any situation can be a learning moment, do not put yourself above the person that is calling you out – hear them out. When you sit down to have a conversation with a student, leader, or peer and want to confront them – think about where you have struggled in life, perhaps in the same areas.

2. Be quick to speak…scripture tells us not to let the sun go down if we are angry with our brother or sister in Christ. We need to talk things out –  NOT in the heat of the moment, take a breath, take a walk, talk with God first. We need to make sure we are speaking in love, not out of our sin nature in anger or hate. Have open ears to listen to the other person, but we cannot let important feedback linger. If we confront someone about a situation that took place 6 months ago, this could blur the lines of caring, urgency, and priority. If it was that important, why are you waiting until now to bring it up? Avoiding the conversation will only make things worse and furthermore show that this confrontation is not important.

3. Be honest. I know that when I’m honest with a student or leader, there might be some questions, dislike, hurt feelings, perhaps even disagreement but in the end they usually thank me for being honest. The worst thing that could happen is being honest with others about how you feel toward a particular person without being honest directly with that specific person, this is called GOSSIP! Honesty can and will complicate conversations, but it does bring us closer to the realities we are discussing and the feelings we are feeling.

4. Follow Up. I had a really tough conversation with a student a few weeks ago – it was honest, we both showed humility, and both of us saw it as a learning experience. We perceived certain things about each other that seemed to drive a wedge between us…we both perceived wrongly. It was so good to clear the air and have the tough conversation. Through tears, prayer and hug I still felt a little bit uneasy where things were left UNTIL the follow up. We briefly talked exactly a week later and I feel much better as where things stand. Tough conversations can be really hard for both the listener and the one who feels compelled to say something…let it settle in for a while. Evaluate the conversation as you have it, will this need to be re-visited? Do I need to bring in a parent or church staff member into this conversation? What would be the best way to follow up? Make it a point to tell your listener…”I’d like to follow up next week.” And do it! This shows that your truly care about them. Ask them how they are doing, ask them if they have had any thoughts on the conversation you had. If you are the listener and you think it may be needed, make sure you ask for a follow up conversation. Some things might be revealed to you that you should not respond to in the heat of the moment, let it settle…pray over the things said, do a self evaluation and perhaps seek wise counsel from someone you respect.

Though there are many things to consider, but these few things kept in mind when having a tough conversation can be extremely helpful. I know they have helped me!

Subscribe via email RSS feed in the top right corner to be updated when a new post is written.

We’re moving…

by Leave a Comment

We’re moving to Texas! The word is out officially among both our current and future church homes…the transition days are very bittersweet, it continues to be an emotional rollercoaster. We are sad to move away from Wheaton Bible Church, our friends in the Chicagoland area, and the many memories and ministry experiences that God has created here over the past 6 years. While it is hard to say goodbyes, we are thoroughly excited and welcome the opportunity at Gateway Church in Austin, Texas! I have accepted the position of Student Pastor overseeing the middle school and high school ministry.

After a long interview process, much prayer, seeking wisdom from mentors, family and friends we are confident that God indeed has blessed mine and Calla’s calling to Austin. We are both looking forward to see how God will use us in this next chapter of life together.

Your prayers are appreciated during our transition in the weeks ahead!

Reading 1-2-1

by Leave a Comment

Can the Bible be used as an evangelism tool? Your answer, “We’d be lost without it!” But what I’m getting at is actually inviting someone who is far from God or unfamiliar with the Bible to study it with you. I presented this challenge to my adult leaders in student ministry. Some latched on to the idea and a few ran with it. One man in particular who has been a leader for many years felt so compelled by the Spirit during my challenge that his neighbor came to mind. That very week, with the Bible in hand, he walked across the street and asked his neighbor to meet with him and read the Bible…his neighbor agreed! They started with the gospel of Luke and read the whole thing! The neighbor proceeded with, “Shouldn’t we start at the beginning?” They read through Genesis and now are working through the Old Testament, and may I remind you that this man does not have a relationship with Christ! Can you imagine what it would be like to learn how to study the Bible before coming to faith? He will know how to feed himself the Word of truth and where to go for answers about life and faith.

A quote from the book One-to-One Bible Reading that I gave each of my leaders and some choice student leaders:

“We asked a total of 1,000 twenty-something unchurched people; 900 American, 100 Canadian. And we compared them to a sample of 500 older unchurched (30 or above)…
One of the questions that we asked them to agree or disagree with was: ‘I would be willing to study the Bible if a friend asked me to?’ Among twenty-somethings, 61-percent said, ‘Yes.’ Among their older counterparts of 30 and above, 42-percent said, ‘Yes.’ And that was a statistically significant difference, telling us there’s something going on, there’s an openness that’s there. So we’re seeing that as an opportunity–that in the midst of some negative views of the church, there is also some openness to the things of God.”

In a previous post I did talk about the dropout rate of high school students walking away from their church and faith. Let this be an encouragement that their are many that are thirsty for the truth, but more importantly are awaiting the ask, “Will you study the Bible with me?”

Who in your life could you invite to read the Bible with you that might be far from God and unfamiliar with His love for them.

Pray for opportunities.

Watch for opportunities.

Act on opportunities.

Grab your copy of One-to-One Bible Reading

Subscribe by email or RSS feed in the top right corner of page for immediate postings or updates!

Eat Blueberry Pancakes

by Leave a Comment

It’s not my first choice on the menu…pancakes. I’m more of an eggs and bacon kind of guy. I know my wife loves them and I do like the idea of creating them, I love cooking! This past weekend we decided to take a few days off to enjoy the great outdoors. We packed up the truck with all our camping gear and headed north to Devil’s Lake in Wisconsin. The park was quite full so we camped at a nearby campground Mirror Lake, it’s quite the gem. We spent most of our first day setting up camp, napping, talking around the campfire and praying together – there is just something about getting away from your every day schedule that allows you to think more clearly and put the life that God has given you in perspective.

We invited another couple to join us for the weekend. They are very close friends of ours and came up later that night after getting off work. It was a comfort and refreshing thing to spend an intentional weekend with another couple that re-energizes us and gave us all an opportunity to minister to one another.

After a long day of hiking and rock climbing the cliffs at Devil’s Lake we ended the evening with chili over the campfire. The next morning I put some coffee on and then proceeded to make some thick, fluffy, blueberry pancakes. I did have my eggs and bacon but also threw down a giant blueberry pancake! It was perhaps the best pancake I’ve ever had…and a new favorite.

The truth is, no matter if things are going great, life is a little crazy or you find yourself in tough situations I think the three following things can bring great joy to your life and family:

1.) GO CAMPING. Maybe you aren’t the happy camper…but do try to get away from everything – including that cell phone. Throw the normal schedule out the window for a couple of days…enjoy the adventure!

2.) TIME WITH FRIENDS. Great friends are priceless. Find them and keep them close – they can be your greatest boost of energy while serving in full-time ministry.

3.) EAT BLUEBERRY PANCAKES. More specifically, try something new whether it be a new food, a new exercise routine, or book series. You never know…you just might like it!

Keep up to date with blog posts by subscribing in the top right corner of the page. Pass the link on to a friend! www.lifeofayouthpastor.com

They are graduating from church…

by Leave a Comment

It’s that time of year when the youth pastor gets invited to all those graduation parties! There is usually great food, music in the air, an embarrassing slide show that may involve naked baby photos, and of course the anxious graduate who is ready to rip through all the cards to see how much money they got…I was no different. Though each party may have its own flavor one thing stays the same, the sigh of relief on the parents face, the look that says, “I can’t believe they made it…I can’t believe I made it!”

I’m sure as a parent, a youth pastor or small group leader you have found those graduation parties quite the celebration and milestone in your students life. They did it! They completed their homework assignments (almost all of them), they made some good friends, they learned how to prepare for college by writing essays and learning word processing systems and now they are ready to be sent off into the world…or are they?

While reading a book about why young people leave the church (specifically those graduating seniors) I came across a staggering statement…

“Teenagers are some of the most religiously active Americans.

 American twenty-somethings are the least religiously active.”

According to the polls and interviews we as the church can easily observe that this IS the reality of  church attendance and participation. Birth through high school we see active participation and attendance…it actually increases as the student approaches high school. Suddenly as if overnight, there is a nose dive in church participation, we have lost those graduates…but WHY?!

I could write all day on this subject and even present many topics that we could dissect and explore WHY older teenagers and early twenty-somethings are leaving the church…getting a driver’s license, exploring job opportunities, going “off” to college, but aren’t there churches near the college too?  It seems that many not only graduate from high school never looking back but also graduate their faith! What I’m getting at is this, we the church and parents hold their hand birth-12th…walking them to their age specific rooms, ensuring that they get on the right missions trip, help pay for the perfect Christian camp, and even recruit leaders to walk alongside them every year in a small group setting. What happens next after graduation is eye-opening…nothing. Nothing happens. Where did my small group leader go? What happened to my age specific class or community? Where do I sign up for a serving opportunity or even a small group now that I’m an adult?

We must combat the dropout rate by sending out missionaries…equipping our graduates for life on their mission field wherever God places them.

I’ll be the first to confess that my church doesn’t do the greatest job in transitioning our graduates into the greater body of the church. We are aware of this problem and are searching for ways to combat the nose dive. Here are a few ideas we have moving forward…I would love to hear what others are doing!

  • Provide a specific curriculum for all graduating seniors to go through their spring semester
  • Find ways for small group leaders stay connected to their students throughout the college years
  • Put “college ministry” under the student ministry umbrella to ensure responsibility is being taken on by a ministry within the church
  • Provide a one year stent program that would allow those graduates not going to college to participate in ministry both locally and globally

The book that dives more into this discussion can be found in my library, “You Lost Me.”

Enjoy your read? Subscribe and the postings will be automatically directed to your mailbox. Just visit the top right corner of this page!

Facebook for kids…really?!

by Leave a Comment

Do you have a Facebook account? I remember when I was in high school I had to borrow a college friend’s email address to make a profile for myself… well folks, the children have caught on to the same scheme. The kids of today are doing similar things and want to be at the life of the party, the little blue “f” symbol has piqued their curiosity. I was reading USA Today this morning…

USA TODAY NEW YORK (AP) — Though Facebook bans children under 13, millions of them have profiles on the site by lying about their age.

Now, the company is testing out ways to allow younger kids on its site without needing to lie. It would be under parental supervision, such as by connecting children’s accounts to their parents’ accounts. That would allow Facebook to comply with federal regulations regarding children under 13 online.

The Wall Street Journal reported on the development in Monday’s editions. It could be a long way off, or never get implemented, as happens with many features that Facebook tests.

In a statement, Facebook says it is in ongoing dialogue with stakeholders, regulators and other policymakers about how best to help parents keep their kids safe online.

For all of us that participate in youth ministry – whether it be a parent, youth pastor, small group leader, teacher, etc. I would hope that we pay close attention to what our youth are able to access on the computer, phone, tablet, etc. Though some sites like fb can be seemingly harmless, they too can contain vile ads, inappropriate pictures posted by others and provide “secret” places for private conversations.

How do you as a parent know what your child looks at on the computer? Would love to get some comments on this one, please share!

If you haven’t already…subscribe in the top right corner of the page to get postings delivered directly to your mailbox!

I found the USA Today article here.

Take your street for Jesus.

by Leave a Comment

Fanchon St. – Our rental has been quite the fixer-upper for my wife and I during our first year of marriage. Our honeymoon house. The home was built in the 1920’s and moved to Fanchon St. in the 1940’s (our landlord is a house mover). Along with character it has bubbling plaster walls and uneven floors. Since moving in my father-in-law and I re-walled the bathroom, Calla and I painted the whole place and I transformed a dirt pile into a yard with grass and a garden!

The first night after our wedding we came home to pack for our honeymoon, it was storming pretty bad…the ceiling in the living room was bowed with a crack down the middle gushing water all over the newly installed carpet!!! Needless to say we still packed, threw some buckets under the leaks and jetted out the door for for our honeymoon. Oh the beauty of renting and not owning! And yes…I did call my landlord once we pulled off Fanchon St.

We drove 12 hours north to the quaint, boundary waters town of Grand Marais, Minnesota. There we enjoyed the great outdoors and a beautiful cabin overlooking one of Minnesota’s 10,000 lakes. One week later we sank back into the reality of “real life” on Fanchon St.

We were the only married couple on our street when we moved in last year. Our neighbor on the left is a recently divorced man, to our right an older single woman whose boyfriend visits on the weekends. Across the street a family with many kids from different marriages, the current couple is not married….and more identities unfolded over the year as we got to know our neighbors. We picked up the bits and pieces on what all these people shared in common…a longing for community.

My wife and I began praying for our neighbors…that we might have the opportunity to be Jesus to them. Our prayer and dreams began spinning out of control as we prayed for months and months that we would have opportunities to love our neighbors, serve our neighbors and help build the foundation of a community that would be centered on the hospitality and grace of Jesus.

Nothing happened. Sure, there were good conversations here and there…times we were able to share our faith stories with them…but nothing really happened. Our prayers, hopes and what we were wishing for were not lining up with the reality that Fanchon St. was still the same old Fanchon St.

We had to take initiative…our hopes needed to be followed by action. We decided to have a campfire in the backyard and invite everyone over for s’mores! We made it a BIG DEAL and let them know all about it by printing off colorful postcards and putting one in each mailbox…it was titled “Friday on Fanchon St.” The incredibly small investment of time, intentionality and an invitation paid huge dividends for the kingdom of God. That night everyone showed up, parents, kids, a baby, and around that campfire we had COMMUNITY! As if we couldn’t ask for more, one woman stayed particularly late and we had the opportunity to unfold the love of Christ in the gospel story and share how we know the Bible is historically accurate.

Need I say more? Take your street for Jesus. They are longing for community, more than that – longing for the person of Jesus Christ.